1. Hot Chocolate or apple cider? hot chocolate, I love Chocolate!

2. Turkey or Ham? either, but usually for Christmas it’s Ham

3. Do you get a Fake or Real Christmas tree? at my parent’s house it’s a fake tree, although we planted trees years ago and would pick fresh ones off our property since it was a tree nursery before they built the house on the land.

4. Decorations on the outside of your house? no, I usually have lights up in my room here in VA, and my Dad has put up lights outside on the house in NJ.

5. Snowball fights or sledding? snowball fights but sledding is cool too, used to sled down the hills off the garden state parkway between north and south bound lanes.

6. Do you like hanging around the fireplace because it’s warm? yes, and I wish we could use the fireplace in the house I live in now.

7. Do you enjoy going downtown shopping? I don’t really like shopping in crowds.

8. Favorite Christmas song? Fairytale of New York and Everybody’s Waiting for the Man with The Bag (even though Macy’s is using it for their holiday marketing campaign now….)

9. How do you feel about Christmas movies? Christmas Story is by far the best.

10. When is it too early to start listening to Christmas music? Before thanksgiving….anymore it gets started on HALLOWEEN!!! that’s too early

11. Stockings before or after presents? as a young kid we did those first, parents’ orders, as we got older they stopped the stockings.

12. Carolers, do you or do you not watch and listen to them? if any were to stop by and sing I would.

13. Go to someone elses house or they come to you? both

14. Do you read the Christmas Story? many variations of it.

15. What do you do after presents and dinner? after presents, usually play with the all the kids and their toys. after dinner, I used to hit McGuire’s in AC for a few pints, but now I either meet up with friends or just hang with the family.

16. What is your favorite holiday smell? evergreen trees, apple pie if mom is cooking

17. Ice skating or walking around the mall? ice skating as I tend to avoid malls anymore.

19. Favorite Part about winter? the cold gets to me after awhile
but I like that you have an excuse to stay in and wrap blankets around you and watch tv.

20.Favorite Christmas decor? lights. I love the lights!

21.Lights…colored or clear? all kinds, all colors, and clear too!

22. What is the best Christmas gift you ever received? the year my brother and his wife told me I didn’t have to pay them the rest of what I owed them for the used pickup truck they were selling to me

23. What is your favorite Christmas tradition in your family? we don’t do it anymore, because we all can’t fit in one house, but as a kid, we weren’t allowed downstairs until we sung a christmas carol at the top of the stairs!!

24. What is your least favorite thing about the holidays? getting sick and trying to see everyone.

25. What is the one thing that you would like to see under the tree this year? as an adult we don’t give many presents anymore, but what I’d really want is to know that all my debt is gone and I don’t have to deal with this stupid car accident bullshit anymore.

26. What is your favorite thing to do/build in the snow? snow forts (if the snow is deep) and snow people

27. What is your favorite holiday drink? don’t really have one.

28. Who is your favorite reindeer? rudolph (I identify with him)

29. What is your Christmas Eve ritual? church with the family to hear my Mom and Dad sing, but for many years, it was driving over to the Grites’ household to hang with Jer, his family, exchange our gifts, and listen to music!! usually the latest thing Jeremy recorded with whomever:Swivel Chairs, Marlin Spikes, solo stuff, and anything else he had on tap.

30. Are you a Friday after Thanksgiving shopper? after 8 years in retail HELL….absolutely NOT. I take great pride in no longer having to work on that day.

31. What is your favorite holiday food? apple pie

32. How did you find out that Santa wasn’t real? see earlier post or my other blog: wordtravelsfast.blogspot.com

33. Who do you want to be under the mistletoe with? I could name names but I’d get in trouble, plus, I’d rather it be completely random, like it should be.

34. Have you bought all your presents yet? I don’t buy a whole lot because there’s not much to buy with, but I have picked up a few items that I happened to think of while I had the opportunity.

35. Do you spend Christmas with a lot of family? immediate family, and that means a good number. immediate family, including Grandmother and Great Aunt is now at the robust figure of 16!!

36. Do you still make snowmen and snow angels? If there’s enough snow to do so and I have someone to help me, it’s not that fun playing in the snow alone!

38. What do you plan to do for New Year’s Eve? I’ve been invited to a party in philly and it’s easy for me, because I don’t have to worry about being on the road with the other crazy people.

39. What’s the most expensive thing you’ve gotten for Christmas?
when I was 15 I got a Flyers jersey, my brother’s old pickup was worth a few thousand at least….nothing major really.

40. How early do you wake up on Christmas morning? at the last possible moment, even as a kid I slept in mostly. now since the little kids will be at the house this year, I have a feeling it’s going to be a real early morning!!! but it will be fun to have the excitement again!

41. What do you usually get in your stocking? we don’t have them anymore, but it used to be candy, pistachios, fruit, socks, toothbrush, nail polish, you get the idea…

42. Who would you like to see this Christmas? I am hoping that I don’t get sick and can spend time with my family, Brenda, Joe and their three girls, and see some friends too.

It’s hard to believe but it appears as though I’ve lost my Claddagh ring that I got in Galway when Laverne and I went to Ireland back in March.

I’ve *almost* lost it a few times, as I am definitely my father’s daughter and play the role of ‘absent minded professor’ ALL too well. But all those times I’ve left it on my dresser or my desk at work or at home and it’s been right where I left it.

However, every so often the ring wouldn’t stay on my finger. It literally would slide off my hand. I figure it probably has something to do with the fact that I take Celebrex daily and it’s an anti-inflammatory which would probably make my hands less swollen.

A few times while searching through my bag or purse it would fall off and I would just leave it there, thinking it was probably better off being there at that time than on my hand where it might fall off anywhere.

Recently, I couldn’t find it until I put my gloves back on (which I don’t wear every day, despite the cold.) and hadn’t realized it caught on the inside of the glove’s ring finger.

sigh…I hope I find it. I can always get another, but the fact that I bought it IN Galway on our trip holds that memory with it.

I hung out (babysat) with Rebekka tonight. She’s the 3year old daughter of my friends, Brian and Annette. I’ve had a lot going on in my head lately, including tonight.

but as Rebekka and I were playing with her toys and watching tv, she was sitting with me, leaning her head on my arm, and snuggling up next to me when she stated:

‘I love you lauree’ then she hugged me and said ‘big hugs’

at the end of the day and in the grand scheme of things, isn’t that all we need?!

from the minds and mouths and arms of three year old children can sometimes come the most simplified and profound needs of every single human being….

40 questions about 2005. (I left out 11-14 since didn’t fall in love with anyone)

1) Was 2005 a good year for you?
not really

2) What was your favorite moment of the year?
-riding in the backseat of a convertible at night, top down, looking up at a million stars in the Big Sur, CA sky on the way back to Monterey.
-standing on top of our production van and watching Ted Leo perform at Operation Ceasefire.

3) What was your least favorite moment of the year?
February 6, 2005 4:12pm
car accident with my 12 year old nephew in the car

4) Where were you when 2005 began?
philadelphia

5) Who were you with?
friends

6) Where will you be when 2005 ends?
philadelphia

7) Who will you be with when 2005 ends?
not sure yet

8) Did you keep your new years resolution of 2005?
I started off really well with going to the gym and eating healthy, but the car accident fucked it up royally.

9) Do you have a new years resolution for 2006?
I resolve to do what I want to do and what is best for me.

10) Did you fall in love in 2005?
no, I’m still waiting

15) Did you breakup with anyone in 2005?
no

16) Did you make any new friends in 2005?
yes, a few.

17) Who are your favorite new friends?
I don’t have favorites.

18) What was your favorite month of 2005?
January

19) Did you travel outside of the US in 2005?
yes, my first visit to Ireland with Laverne (who helped me get there)

20) How many different states did you travel to in 2005?
8 (but anytime I go home, I hit 4 of them. sometimes, five)

21) Did you lose anybody close to you in 2005?
no, thankfully

22) Did you miss anybody in the past year?
yes, lots of people

23) What was your favorite movie that you saw in 2005?
so far, it would have to be The Boys & Girl From County Clare which I saw at Filmfest DC this past Spring. A great Irish music film.

24) What was your favorite song from 2005?
oh wow, I couldn’t pick just one.

25) What was your favorite record from 2005?
I don’t participate in choosing these each year. It makes my head spin.

26) How many concerts did you see in 2005?
not as many as I wanted to…

27) Did you have a favorite concert in 2005?
it’s been a slow year, but The Bigger Lovers final show was BITTERSWEET good for sure

28) did you drink a lot of alchohol in 2005?
oh wow, I really have cut back a lot.

29) did you do a lot of drugs in 2005?
I take four prescriptions a day right now, does that count? otherwise, I usually just have alcohol as my “drug” of choice.

30) How many people did you sleep with in 2005?
none, well I did sleep in a bed one night with a Scotsman, but it was mostly sleeping….
I am literally blushing right now.

31) Did you do anything you are ashamed of this year?
a few things…but nothing major really.

33) What was the worst lie someone told you in 2005?
I haven’t been told much of anything

34) Did you treat somebody badly in 2005?
I try to treat people the way I want to be treated, although it doesn’t always work out.

35) Did somebody treat you badly in 2005?
insurance companies, doctors who don’t care, people who forget I exist (or at least it feels that way)

36) How much money did you spend in 2005?
more than I should have.

37) What was your proudest moment of 2005?
having my annual review at work and being complimented instead of being stabbed in the back, and finally realizing my work is worth something.

38) What was your most embarrassing moment of 2005?
being examined in the emergency room after my car accident and realizing I had an old beat up bra on.

39) If you could go back in time to any moment of 2005 and change something, what would it be?
to not get hit by the car that ran the stop sign that has practically fucked up my entire year.

40) What are your plans for 2006?
oh so many, but mainly I’d just like to be happy, healthy and see if I can find someone to share it with….

I’ve been debating about posting this question for a week or two. Who am I to squash the myth of the holiday season upon us?!

For some silly reason, just before Thanksgiving, I had a memory pop into my head of Christmas seasons past. I have an almost unbelievable memory which losing it is probably one of the top few biggest fears I have. I can remember things from when I was a toddler and even some as early as infancy.

Around the holidays, I was ALWAYS sick. It seemed that almost every Christmas I either was so sick I couldn’t breathe properly or I was constantly having my face in a bucket or running to the bathroom to throw up. (these early skills have definitely been useful in my adult years of overindulgence of massive amounts of alcohol)

(Santa Claus believers can STOP reading NOW!!!!)

The memory that popped into my head a few weeks ago was the Christmas where I discovered there wasn’t really a Santa Claus. I am the youngest of four, and there’s a four, six and seven year difference between me and the three of them. I was about 7 or 8 and of course had a stomach virus of some sort. My parent’s were singing in the choir at both services on Christmas Eve at our church, so my three older siblings were looking after me. Apparently, they were also instructed to assist my parents with the Christmas presents.

In one of my many trips to the bathroom to get sick, I saw them downstairs carrying presents and putting them under the tree. I also caught my sister putting together a fischer-price dollhouse that was to be a present for me. And that’s when I knew it was Mom and Dad, and siblings who got the presents there, despite many presents that clearly were marked “from Santa.”

I remember that it wasn’t so much of shock, but more of a disappointment. I just went back to my room to my glass of 7-up and went to sleep.

It seems like it was yesterday.

I still pretend to believe though.